Where I blog about fiber arts, literature, and life...

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Research Papers, Graduation, and 'Charlie, the guy with horses'?

Here it is half way through August and I feel like I haven't accomplished much. My bedroom still isn't as organized as I would like it to be, I haven't designed as much as I planned on, etc.  I keep thinking things will pick up and I will suddenly feel motivated to get stuff done.

I did start writing about a weird dream I had in June. It started out as climbing out of a townhouse fourth floor balcony in New York City (not sure how I got there) to escape from I don't know who and running to a nearby mall to find Charlie (I don't know any Charlies, by the way) and Charlie's horses. Because apparently if I found Charlie and his horses everything would be fixed (Yes, my dreams get weird. One time I flew to Mars in an inflatable spaceship). 20 pages later it turned into an international socialist conspiracy targeting young aspiring novelists at a creative writing conference in Seattle (Mostly because I know more about Seattle than about New York. All the super heroes are from New York anyway. It's overrated). Kinda crazy, huh? All those diabolical colonization strategies I learned about in Post-Colonial lit last semester just might be useful after all. 

But, yeah, that's how my brain works. Believe it or not, there actually was some vague connection between my dream and the story that came of it. I just can't remember what that was. The whole story is a bit confusing, but it makes sense to me
So, I'll do some research and we'll see if it turns out as zany as it sounds. 
Research is only fun on my own terms. I guess that's where my little hidden rebellious streak peeks out now and then. If I have to write a paper about something, and if everything has to be just so, then it's really a drag, and I procrastinate. Especially if it's a long one.
The best space-filler trick I ever learned in college was increasing the font size of all the periods and commas in a paper, while leaving the rest of the text at 12 point. Saves me between half and a full page, depending on the length of the paper. *snicker snicker, te he he...* All you Freshmen out there...you didn't get this from me.
I may be a Lit major, but there is only so such to be said about poetry written in a state of intoxication, no matter how classic it is considered.

So now with the beginning of the semester less than 3 weeks away, I guess I'd better hop to it and start accomplishing something.

Paper writing trick: Check!

"Charlie": Check!


I get the question, "what are you going to do after you graduate?" almost daily now. Well, graduation may be only 6 months away, but I never know what to tell people. I've come up with some ideas, but they change almost as often as the question is asked.

The truth is, I don't know what I will be doing. I don't know what I want to do. I had a dream for my future but it may not be an option right now. I've thought about World Vision, being a Literary Agent, working for a yarn company, getting certified to teach ESL and leaving the country, teaching music to home schoolers, editing, interning, writing for a recording studio, etc... Not only do none of those things make me go, "Yeah! That's what I want to do for the rest of my life!", there's no guarantee that I will even be able to get into a particular field should I have the desire to.

I know God will bring me something. He has good plans for me. It would be nice if He revealed them sooner rather than later.

So to anyone who has asked me about it recently: I have no answer for you and no answer for myself. I had hoped to have it figured out by now, but I don't, and I'm not sure when I will.

I feel like my life is still on hold until then.

No comments:

Post a Comment